Soul Alchemy
by KonekoNoRenkinjutsushi
Summary: Roy's team is hunting a group of bandits, and when they find one, he uses alchemy to switch Roy, Riza, Al, Ed, and a cat's bodies!
1. The Mission

Disclaimer: I do not own FMA.

~Roy's POV~

It was a pretty dang normal day for Roy, he woke up and felt normal. _'I think today is going to be a good day,' _He thought. Nevertheless, Roy's instincts were kinda bad.

He got up and got dressed, and headed to headquarters. Once he was there, he met up with Riza, Havoc, Fuery, Breda, Falman, Black Hayate, and everyone else on his team. He was late, even though he woke up early. He never figured out how that happens. It just works that way for Roy Mustang.

Riza stacked a pile of paperwork on his desk. He sighed, and started to sing the paperwork song, but all of a sudden he was seeing a barrel in front of his face and the sharp sting of Hawkeye's words caught him as she said "Shut it and do your paperwork, Colonel."

Soon she had called the group into a quick meeting as she announced that they were all heading to a mission.

"We're heading to the West tower to handle a few bandits. The briefing is on the board by the door, if you noticed it. Please take a look and get ready, because we are leaving in 5 hours."

"Wait a second. What are we handling again?" asked Havoc.

"A group of bandits, sir. They are to be put in to custody."

"But why are _we _doing this? Shouldn't we be doing something more like what we're used to?"

"Just shut up and get over it. We've been assigned to this mission, and I see no reason why we shouldn't do it."

"Fine."

Soon we were all ready and leaving, and Hawkeye suddenly whispered in my ear, "Please be careful, sir." I answered with a "Yes, ma'am." She smiled as she left the room.

~Edward's POV~

"Geez, that stupid bastard, calling me all the way out here just because he wants me to be in his mission."

"You shouldn't say things like that, brother, you'll end up missing him later, I hear what you say when you sleep." Al commented.

"Wha- Al, why do you listen to what I say when I'm asleep!"

"I can't help it, Ed, I'm not used to being able to sleep at night!"

"Whatever. I see central up ahead. Let's go see that bastard colonel."

"Okay, brother."

"...Hey Al?"

"Yes, brother?

"...Nevermind."

Al looked at me skeptically, and then ignored it. We were walking up the steps of central headquarters, and Roy suddenly bursted out of the doorway, slamming me in the face.

"Brother!" Al screamed.

"Oh, sorry Ed, I couldn't see you down there." Roy snickered.

"Damn you. That really hurt... You'd almost think you're able to know exactly when I'm coming up the doorsteps just to slam me in the face on purpose." Ed said, while holding in the major nosebleed he was having.

"Ed, don't blame the colonel for things he didn't mean to do." Al scolded.

Roy smirked. "Don't worry, Alphonse, I'm sure Ed just wants to get back on me for the short joke I cracked on him last time he was in central. Don't worry, I think we're both fine."

"Who're you calling a miniature shrimp you could pair with cocktail sauce!"

"No one said that, Edward."

"Oh. Yeah. Of course no one said that."

"I'm going to go ahead and head to the West tower. Need a ride?"

"Of course I don't want one from you, Colonel Bas-"

"We'd love one, Colonel." Al cut Ed off.

"Tch."

We got into the car and headed towards the West tower. As soon as we got there, we found the bandit. I immediately realized that this wasn't a bandit. It had set up a transmutation circle as a trap. Roy charged, not noticing the circle. I immediately screamed.

"Roy, NOOOO!"

"!"

Al and I ran after him to try and stop him, but I realized Al was only going after the cat that had flung itself into the circle. (Wait, where did that come from?) Riza was fast as lightning, and ran ahead of me to grab Roy. The split second we were all in the transmutation circle, the so-called bandit clapped his hands down on the ground and we all screamed bloody murder. I reached out to Alphonse to try and calm him, but ended up grabbing his arm and fainting.

_'Where am I? Am I dead? Am I going to die?'_

I immediately recognized the scene I faced. The gate opening, thousands of tiny hands pulling me down, down, where I didn't want to go. Suddenly I faced a cat. _'What? A cat? Oh, that's the one Al went after.'_ I saw a dot. It was a sparkling, pretty dot, but it gave me the chilling feeling that I didn't want it to be there. Suddenly thousands more dots of the same characteristics appeared, and started attaching to me and pulled me further, further towards the cat. I found myself struggling as I was being sucked, down into the cat's body. I passed out of fright of what happened.

~Riza's POV~

I slowly gained consciousness and questioned myself.

_'What happened? Oh, that's right. I went after Roy. Wait, ROY!'_

"Roy!" I screamed out, but something wasn't right. This wasn't my voice. It was a darker, muscular voice. I looked down. The same blue uniform. _'But wait, I have a man's body.' _I reached up and felt my hair. Short. _'O MY JEEBUS, I'M ROY MUSTANG!'_

I looked around, finally acknowledging my surroundings. There was Ed, Al, the cat, and ME. All on a transmutation circle. You could see the rest of our group had passed out at the entrance of the tower during the transmutation.

_'But if I'm in Roy's body, then...' _Who else is in each of our bodies?

Edward was slowly getting up.

"Ah! Edward!" Roy's voice. I hate it. _'Wait. That can't be Edward. It has to be someone else.'_

"So, who are you?"

"What are you talking about? I'm Alphonse." Edward's body said. "Wait, that isn't my voice."

"I know. You're in Edward's body." I quickly said, without hesitation.

"Wait. What? You're kidding, Colonel."

"I'm not the colonel. I'm Riza." I was thinking very intently about this.

"Oh, god. If there is one. This can't happen. I just got my body back!"

Slowly, the cat got up. _'Oh, no... Who's in the cat's body?'_

"Meow. MEOW. MEOW!" (Meh. Wait. Did I just meow?) The cat seemed to be pointing at Alphonse in Edward's body, and back to himself. They took it as him saying, 'Wait, that's me!'

"Oh, Jesus. It's Edward." Riza sighed mentally.

"Brother!" Alphonse picked Edward up under his shoulders and brought him into his lap. "It's me, Alphonse! I'm in your body!"

Edward looked perplexed, even though he couldn't talk.

The three turned their heads to Al's body, who was slowly stretching and yawning like a cat.

"Well, I guess we know who's in your body, Alphonse."

"Eeh... The cat? But why _my_ body?"

"Probably because you three were touching each other as the transmutation was going on. You all switched bodies with each other. And I switched bodies with this guy." Riza pointed to herself.

The cat smiled and curled up in a ball on the ground before falling asleep in the corner.

I joked about Al's body being tired, and then we turned our head to Roy.

I slightly shook him, and he slurred out something that sounded like 'ffurve maar minshishh.', which I took as 'five more minutes.'

I started to kick him slowly, getting faster. Soon enough, he was up shouting "I GET IT I GET IT STOP KICKING ME IT HURTS!"

"Wait. That isn't my voice."

"Yeah. That's because you're in my- or Riza's body."

He looked down. "Yeap. Definitely."

He started to take a peek down my shirt as I yelled at him, "DON'T even, Colonel."

"Fine, Fine. So who's who over there?"

"I'm Alphonse, that's the cat in my body, and Ed's in the cat's body."

"Ed's in the WHAT!" He started cracking up and was soon full out laughing.

Ed sauntered over to Roy casually and sunk his kitty claws into Roy's hand.

"AAAUgh! Jesus, Ed, just because you're a cat doesn't mean you have to be the most bitchy human- or cat- on earth!"

"Whatever. Just don't completely wreck my body, Edward." Edward looked up indignantly as if to say, 'Why not?'

"We need to get to the point." Riza interrupted. "How did we get like this?"

"The bandit clearly used alchemy." Alphonse said. Ed looked like he wanted to say something, but all he could do was meow. Al rubbed his ears and he fell over in enjoyment.

"But, how could he do it?''

**A/N: My first serious story! Yay! Please review, it makes me write more! Ideas and structural help is welcome! I plan on continuing this, so be excited for chapter 2!**


	2. Dealing with it

Disclaimer: I do not own FMA.

Mlni7: I loved writing the first chapter so much, I'm writing the next one the day after!

Havoc: But why do that? I don' wanna wake up to find my body switched~

Mlni7: Your body doesn't change. Now shut up and get to the story, because no one loves you. Except for some crazy people that think he's sexy.

Havoc: People think I'm sexy!

Mlni7: NO. Don't get your hopes up, Jean.

~end of short~

Chapter 2

~Ed's POV~

I'm not liking this. Not at all. I'm a cat. Cats are my least favorite animal. Now I am one. This is getting confusing. At least it explains the scene of the cat I saw earlier.

I watched everyone explaining what had happened. I kept trying to explain as well, but I couldn't talk. I could just meow.

Al rubbed behind my ears and it felt heavenly. _'Is this what it's like to be a cat?'_

They were soon asking where to find the information to change back, and I hadn't even noticed that they had talked about all the other parts because I had been paying attention to the heavenly scratches. Riza had put a band-aid on Roy's hand because of what I did, and they were questioning how to get me and the cat into the library.

"I could put him in my pocket," Suggested Al.

I looked at him very disgustedly. "Ok, ok, no."

"He could hide in my shirt!" said Roy. Riza glared at him and I looked shocked at his comment. "_Maybe_ not."

"Roy- you could carry a purse and keep Ed in it." Suggested Al.

I looked at her like she was crazy, and then realized it was kind of a good idea. There was just one flaw. How will I breathe in there?

I tried to show them what I meant by holding my paws up to my throat and pretending to choke. They understood. "Don't worry Ed, we'll open up the zipper a little." I breathed a sigh of relief.

But what to do with Al's body?

"Let's drug Al's body and put it in my closet." Roy said, snickering.

"What! But that's _my_ body! You can't do that to it, it just came back from the gate!"

"You know, that just might work." Riza thought aloud.

"What! You guys are cruel." Al pleaded for them not to do it.

"Riza, I have some sleep pills in my upper closet at home, can you drive there and do that?" Roy told Riza.

"Sure."

"You're actually doing it!"

Riza and Roy got up and started leading Al's body to the entrance. I started to follow, and Al picked me up and ran after. I was amazed when I saw that the others were still knocked out. "Might as well not tell them." Riza commented. We got in the car and headed to Roy's house.

~Roy's POV~

I'm pissed. Very pissed. Why me and Riza? Ugh. Now I'm a girl. Well, at least something exciting happened. Instead of the everyday paperwork. I wonder if I can play this off as being sick. Wait. Hawkeye is never sick. Great. Now I'm going to have to go into work as Hawkeye, and do _more_ paperwork.

"Which way do I turn here?" Riza asked me. I didn't notice, and kept mumbling, and that made Riza pissed.

_"Roy, **WHICH WAY DO WE GO!"**_

"Augh! Uh, Left!"

"Are you sure?"

"Oh! Wait no, Right!"

"Ugh."

I was embarrassed for not paying attention. _'That was so stupid.'_

Suddenly Ed was on my shoulder hissing at me for not paying attention.

"GAH! Ed, down!"

"Edward isn't a dog, Roy, he's a cat." Riza commented.

Ed turned around and hissed at Riza too.

"Sorry, Ed, but you are."

Al grabbed Ed and shoved him in a purse, closed it halfway, and put it in my lap. "Here you go." he said.

I grimaced, and Al and Riza glared at me. I got out of the car and headed towards my house. I was swinging the purse back and forth, when Ed started to hiss and claw at my arm. "Ok, ok, I'll stop."

Riza found the sleeping pills, and mixed them in a bowl of milk that she put in the closet. Al's body crawled in and happily lapped up the milk. Soon he was sleeping, and we locked him in there. "You guys are still cruel." added Al.

**A/N: As you may have noticed, I'm using the names of who is inside the bodies, not who they look like. In conversations with people who don't know about the switch, they will be using the names of what their bodies look like. In the next chapter, I'm going to use the reviews people leave about the story in the short at the beginning. Thanks to xXxRizaHawkeyexXx and TheCrimsonGhost309 for reviewing! Also, my cat just got spayed and neutered, and they had to take drugs for the surgery. My first response to this was, "Heh heh. Druggie."**


End file.
